Harold Helfenstein

Harold Helfenstein

Jul 17th 1931 — Apr 11th 2023 (91 years)

Biography

Harold Robert Helfenstein, born in Carshalton, England July 17, 1931, passed away in Hammonds Plains, Nova Scotia and found peace at last from the ravages of cancer during the early morning of April 11, 2023. Harold predeceased his three siblings in Switzerland: sister Lottie Gehrig (Heinz deceased) brothers Jack (Janet deceased) and Marc (Ursi); predeceased by his parents Robert and Charlotte Helfenstein of Switzerland. Harry – as he was called in Canada, leaves to mourn his beloved wife and partner in life, Carolyn Elizabeth (Muir) born in St. John’s, Newfoundland, also their three children: daughter Suzanne, her twin brother Robert, and second son, David. As a family, they enjoyed the togetherness of growing up and working on what became a very successful dairy farm, fondly called Belle Farm. Eventually all three chose their own careers. Suzanne a physiotherapist and her two brothers, both professional pilots, one military, one commercial. Now parents, all three continue to share their farm memories through the tales they tell their own children: Connor and Aidan, Sophie and Nathan, Melanie, Jasmine and Megane. Harry continued to follow all their careers, both their children’s and now their grandchildren’s, with great pride. Not only had he achieved his first goal - as a farmer - their lives had become an important part of his life that would span 91 remarkable years. Harry liked to look back to his youth, war years, where they as a family lived in a small village north of London called Much Hadham, in Morris Cottage known for its history going back to the 1600s. It was there as a boy he enjoyed working on local farms. He declared to his dad, a businessman, that he wanted to own a farm one day and his father suggested he might be wise to spend a while on Swiss mountain farms to test his endurance first. His Swiss grandmother was horrified that her grandson would want to farm, but the mountain experience proved his stamina and despite the fact he had discovered how rugged farm life could be, he was determined to proceed. Fortunately, on his return to England he was accepted into a demanding program at Merrist Wood College in agriculture and horticulture near Guildford – England. However, that was preceded unfortunately by a close call with a scythe that required extensive hand surgery performed by a refugee surgeon from war-torn Europe. Regardless, Harry aced the programs at college, graduated topnotch in the program and was ready to farm. His destiny lay ahead. He eventually boarded an ocean liner bound for Canada and celebrated his 21st birthday in style at sea during the crossing - landing in a port along the St. Lawrence River at Quebec City. There he learned the Canadian government would be taking all his belongings except the clothes on his back; it was 1952, ‘foot, and mouth disease’ was causing worldwide fears. This ruling they explained to anyone aboard the ship who had visited or lived on a farm that year; and Harry was one. He was allowed to travel on by train as far as Toronto while his clothes were being fumigated. The clothes did arrive a week later and then he was ready. His Canadian adventure was about to begin. With that, Harry would look forward to an amazing 70 years of good health and great adventures. Harry never forgot his early years in Canada: wooden seats he sat on to get to Saskatchewan, raking fields of grain that went on forever, riding a horse with a cowboy saddle to round up cattle, and meeting Canadian girls, but only one with red hair became his choice! And just when they had enough money for a down payment on a farm, his dad presented them with two passages on a freighter boat. It looked big, but it wasn’t. It looked sturdy but on the ocean it wasn’t. Carolyn spoke only English; the crew spoke only German. But with only 12 passengers, they ate and drank with the captain, first class, every night. The Helfenstein Seniors were waiting at their home on Lake Zurich, arms out to greet Harry’s bride, Carolyn. They accepted the funny Newfoundland girl with no proper dinner habits. Harry told her that night in bed, she had passed the test. Back in Canada they faced an old barn and a musty house, And mice. Fortunately, it came with running water, and a toilet. Carolyn loved dogs and horses, but Holstein cows were new to her. One night Harry turned to his wife of three years and told her she had beautiful big brown cow-like eyes. She hit him! Nine months later they rushed to the hospital, a baby was coming. Instead, they came home with twins. Harry knew then theirs would be an exciting marriage, never constant, always an adventure. Together they had learned to say, whenever an opportunity came along, “Why not?” Later, when buying a local newspaper after selling the farm, they shocked most of their friends and his parents too. As together they learned the new skills, soon the paper began winning prizes across Ontario and Harry’s special edition won first prize in Canada. As Carolyn’s editorials were acceptable, Harry’s had followers that loved his weekly ideas. Together they covered some earth-shattering news: the death of an infant child left in January snow to die, and a young woman’s disappearance (which is still a mystery today), and 40,000 disheartened farmers from across Canada marching upon government officials in Ottawa. However, it was the exceptionally long hours ten years later, and changing times that resulted in a decision to close the paper, although both knew they would miss the excitement of producing what was called the Teeswater News. Having designed a dream log home near Lake Huron’s shores, they realized that turning their new home into a B and B would be Harry’s legacy, as he had often visited his grandmother’s Swiss hotel as a young man. Carolyn learned to step back and admire how their guests enjoyed watching her 80-year-old husband present them with his unique Swiss muesli, followed by a fry-up of eggs and bacon, his homemade bread and strong coffee. Harry finally shared the stories of the war years when they moved to Nova Scotia, the 62nd year of their marriage. The screen was finally pulled back and like soldiers sharing a past, Carolyn was finally able to see her husband over those years when he was just a boy and then a teen with a dream. “We Never Imagined” With word of his cancer diagnosis, daughter Suzanne, flew to Halifax regularly to be at her father’s side and was able to provide him with incredible care. David was always nearby to manage the trips to hospitals, joined on a final occasion by his brother Robert. Living in Hammonds Plains, David’s wife Myriam and daughters prepared nutritious soups for their Pa hoping to tantalize his fading appetite. Nevertheless, their brief visits brightened Harry’s waning days. As always, the grandchildren took great joy in entertaining their “Pa” as often as possible; playing board games and listening to the stories Pa told them of the dairy farm, and his first home in England; stories that would remain with them for years to come. Rob’s wife Mireille, a career flight attendant, arranged a flight to Halifax to see her adored father-in-law and Carolyn. Over dinner they shared so many good memories. Of course, Harry was keen to learn of Sophie and Nathan’s latest hockey scores. As much as older grandsons - Aidan Hughes and Connor Hughes, and his wife Cara, wanted to be with Pa, Harry’s stern final words that dictated they should ‘attend to one’s obligations’ ‘continue the course, work hard, and raise a toast to their Pa,’ was followed. Suzanne administered the final medications that doctors and VON nurses had prescribed, night and day to give her dad the relief he needed. To the end, Suzanne, Robert and David were there for his needs even as they watched over their mother. They understood her anguish, theirs had been an amazing marriage of over 64 years. Carolyn and Harry appreciated the kindness of their new friends in Nova Scotia and the support from Dwayne and Patti during his final months. Harry had come to feel so much at home in Nova Scotia. Carolyn too appreciated the kind words and the concern that perfect strangers showed, names unknown, offering help when help was needed. Again, and again Harry’s family spoke of the endless kindness of the doctors, nurses and pharmacists, they treated Harold like a favorite uncle. He loved it! *** Dear Friends: Not long ago, Harry and I chatted about how researchers today give their whole lives to finding a way to eradicate the scourge of cancer from our world. Could the cure be found this year? we wondered. Harry sensed it might be soon. Please donate now to help Harry’s wish come true. Wouldn’t that be wonderful? Carolyn Helfenstein A TIME TO SHARE MEMORIES Will happen in May with arrangements for a gathering with Friends and family at Shiraz Gardens. and elsewhere in Ontario, to be announced at a later Date and time to be announced SOON Cremation followed at Harold’s request.

Notes of Condolences about Harold

CAROLYN HELFENSTEIN

8 months ago

Harry, it is almost five months without you, I cannot possibly count the number of tears I've shed, nor the days and adventures I've recalled. Your children and grandchildren continue to display your determination and laughter, as does my love for you, Kiddo.

Yours, Carol

Pam Robbins and Chris Lazarenko

a year ago

We, especially Pam, have had a long history with Harry and Carol. Harry first became a good friend with Pam's Uncle Ken Robbins, back in the days when King City (near Toronto) was nothing like a city but, rather, spacious rural properties and farms. Then Pam's parents (Gwen and Charles) emigrated from England to Canada in May of 1954, along with their 5 year old son Nigel; in the course of visiting with Uncle Ken and Auntie Jan, they got to know Harry before he had even met Carol! Pam was born in 1955, so possibly saw Harry when she was a baby. Charles tape-recorded the wedding ceremony when Harry and Carol tied the knot in December of 1958 (I think that is the correct year!) Pam's family moved to Sudbury in 1960, so direct contact with Harry, Carol and their kids was very minimal for many years, although there was always a connection through Ken and Jan. We did attend at least one Belmore Maple Syrup Festival when I was a kid. There was a pony at Bell Farm, which I seem to recall captured my attention more than the three little kids who lived there! In my university days at Guelph, Carol picked me up one weekend and took me back to the farm, where I first tried my hand at milking a cow. With total lack of success, I must add! At least it was a source of amusement for Harry, who looked on as the cow swished her tail in my face! In 1989, we moved to Kincardine and suddenly were "neighbours" with Carol and Harry! Over these many years, we have developed a deep friendship, which we will always treasure. Countless cups of tea over the kitchen table, fresh baked bread, amazing buttermilk salad dressing - so many wonderful meals and conversations. Harry was not only a great listener, but he was sometimes like a Dad to me, offering suggestions and support during my times of great stress. We did manage a visit in Cobourg, but unfortunately have not yet made it out to Hammonds Plains. We were thrilled to welcome Harry and Carol to our cottage in Northern Ontario last summer. In fact, perhaps we can thank Harry and Carol for inspiring us to get that cottage, because of their "Why Not" attitude! We will always remember Harry, and will miss him so much. Carol and family, we are thinking of all of you with love and affection, and will be there in spirit later today as you gather to celebrate Harry's life.

Jasmine Helfenstein

a year ago

He was always up for a good joke and could easely get a laugh out of anyone. Playing board games with him was always a treat and no matter how much trash-talking was going on, you can never feel bad at loosing to him. He was constantly chearfull. I am very proud to have called him my Pa.

Jack Helfenstein

a year ago

Dear Carol


Rob has been kind enough to keep me informed on Harry so it is with deep sorrow that I heard from him yesterday that your beloved husband and my brother had passed away. I have shared this with Marc and Lottie and they join me in sending you our heartfelt condolences at your and your families loss. I know from my own experience that the void it leaves in your life will be large but his memory of the strong and upright man he was and of all the good times you had together I am sure will help you in your grief.


With love as always


Jack


and


Dear Suzanne, Dear Robert, Dear David


As you can imagine I was really sad to hear from Rob that your Dad had passed away. My sincere condolences to you and your families – I know he will leave a big space in your lives but I am sure his memory will help you in your grief. For me I remember the many great times Janet and I had with your Dad and Mum whether visiting Belle Farm when you were all still tinies or later on Lake Huron and of course when they came to visit here in Switzerland. Particularly I am so glad I came to visit them in the new home in Hammonds Plains and to have the memory of Harry active and full of life to remember.


With love to you all


Jack

Gord Thompson

a year ago

What a great tribute to Harry in words and pictures. Carol and Family please accept my sympathy on Harry's passing. It was truly a privilege to have known Harry. He was a man of many abilities - and immense patience.

Mary T. Kieffer Reid

a year ago

Thinking of ALL of you! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Lots of great memories of the Helfensteins over the years in Teeswater.

Great friends of our Mom and Dad (Joe and Teresa Kieffer)!

Harry will be missed!

Connor and Cara Hughes

a year ago

I've been meaning to send you a letter for a week or so now but I haven't really found the words.

That last phone call I had with him was very tough for Cara and I.... But I'm so glad we did it. He was straight to the point and direct. He didn't beat around the bush or lie about his condition, but at the same time showed his emotional side. As tough as this was, he was true to himself, and that ended up giving Cara and I peace. Even though we both cried for hours and hours, it was nice to know that he was surrounded by his family, supporting him and sharing stories.

I'm very sorry for you loss Nan. He was such a good grandfather to me and he's someone I always looked up to as a human being. I'm sure he was an excellent husband as he was a a grandfather.


I have so many memories of us visiting in Kincardine, on the beach, at the hockey rink, in Cobourg, and finally at our wedding. Let's save these for when we visit you.

Love Connor and Cara Hughes


Janice Kieffer Strickland

a year ago

We have fond and wonderful memories of our great neighbours, Harry and Carol and the friendship they shared with our parents, Berdella and George Kieffer. They shared lots of fun gatherings with many others on the second of Culross. May those memories of the charming and funny Harry give you comfort in the coming days and months.

Rob Mimi Sophie Nathan

a year ago

Harry, our dad and grandpa, was a man of strong convictions, a hard worker, and a person generous to his friends and family alike. The values and love he bestowed onto us will not be lost, as with each passing day, we fondly remember glimpses of the past we shared together. We will miss him dearly, but his love and generosity will always be remembered! A quote was passed onto us recently which we would like to share with you: "Death leaves a heartache no one can heal; love provides memories no one can steal.


Rest in peace Pa

XOXO

Dianna Martell

a year ago

So sorry to hear of your loss. I remember lovely evenings gathering at your home in Point Clark to discuss writing. Harry was a wonderful host!

Suzanne Helfenstein

a year ago

Pa was the man that you always paid attention to when he came into the room. Handsome. Smiling. Had lots of thoughts but spoke little. But you definitely wanted to hear his thoughts. They were always interesting. Work hard… always work hard. Kind. The invaluable lessons of travel and learning your place in the world. Early to bed and early to rise. Always respect mother nature and her power. She is 100% in charge and you will never win. Live your best life. Christmas cake and Harry's Manhattans. Pa lives on in all the people he influenced. Miss you every day.

Donna Stobo

a year ago

I have many happy memories of working with Harry and Carol at the Teeswater News. Harry was a great guy and will be missed by all who knew him. My deepest sympathy to Carol and the family.

Valerie Cowling and Bob Deane

a year ago

We knew you both for such a short time but have fond memories. Our sincere condolences Carolyn and may Harry rest in peace.

Lillian bouzane, NL Wrters' Guild

a year ago

May your husband rest peacefully Carolyn.

MICHAEL BOYLE

a year ago

Condolences Carolyn

from Newfoundland Writers Guild member Michael Boyle

Comments Awaiting Approval:

Approved Comments:

CAROLYN HELFENSTEIN

Pam Robbins and Chris Lazarenko

Jasmine Helfenstein

Jack Helfenstein

Gord Thompson

Mary T. Kieffer Reid

Connor and Cara Hughes

Janice Kieffer Strickland

Rob Mimi Sophie Nathan

Dianna Martell

Suzanne Helfenstein

Donna Stobo

Valerie Cowling and Bob Deane

Lillian bouzane, NL Wrters' Guild

MICHAEL BOYLE

Share Your Memory of Harold